Summary
Overview
Olympic runner Alexi Pappas shares the transformative 'rule of thirds' - the idea that when chasing dreams, you should feel good a third of the time, okay a third, and crappy a third. This single piece of coaching wisdom helped her break a national record at the Rio Olympics and later shaped how she approaches everything from ultramarathons to filmmaking to mental health recovery. In conversation, Alexi opens up about befriending pain, recovering from severe depression by treating it like an athletic injury, and learning that you can commit to action even without belief.
The Breaking Point and the Rule of Thirds
One month before the Rio Olympics, Alexi couldn't hit her splits during a crucial workout and broke down crying in lane one, questioning her worth. Her Olympic coach calmly told her to take her watch off and introduced the rule of thirds: when chasing dreams, you're supposed to feel good a third of the time, okay a third, and crappy a third. This reframing transformed her understanding that bad days aren't failures - they're simply evidence you're pushing beyond your boundaries.
- Alexi couldn't hit her splits one month before the Olympics and cried in lane one, questioning if she was worth it
- Her coach introduced the rule of thirds: feel good 1/3 of the time, okay 1/3, and crappy 1/3 when chasing dreams
- If you feel too good all the time, you're not pushing yourself enough; too bad all the time means you need to dial back
- The coach had her remove her watch because the workout was about effort, not pace
" Take your watch off. It's the rule of thirds. When you're chasing a dream or doing anything hard, you're supposed to feel good a third of the time, okay a third of the time, and crappy a third of the time. "
" If you felt too good all the time, it might be a sign that the ratio is off and you're not pushing yourself enough to go beyond the boundaries of your potential into the great unknown. "
" The bad days aren't bad. They just mean you're chasing a dream. "
Olympic Success and the Shift from Force to Expansion
After applying the rule of thirds, Alexi finished her workout giving 100% effort even without feeling 100% fast, then went on to break a national record and run a personal best at the Rio Olympics. However, she later crashed into severe depression, realizing she had been running away from failure rather than toward something meaningful. Her father's perspective helped her shift from pursuing outcomes at all costs to moving toward expansion and fun, fundamentally changing her relationship with achievement.
- Alexi broke a national record and ran a personal best at the Rio Olympics after embracing the rule of thirds
- Post-Olympics, she experienced severe depression common among Olympians after such an intense focal point
- Her dad told her she could do anything except die or want to die, helping her realize she needed to find fun in life
- She shifted from force and outcome at all costs to moving toward expansion rather than just productivity
" I was running away from failure rather than towards something, wanting to matter, wanting to prove you were worth staying for. "
" My tentpole was no longer like force and outcome at all costs. It was more meet myself where I am and move toward this expansive feeling instead of this productive feeling. "
📚 7 more sections below
Sign up to unlock the complete summary with all insights, key points, and quotes
Get this summary + all future TED Talks Daily episodes in your inbox
100% Free • Unsubscribe Anytime
Sign up now and we'll send you the complete summary of this episode, plus get notified when new TED Talks Daily episodes are released—delivered straight to your inbox within minutes.