Summary
Overview
This rerun episode explores the concept of non-apologies and mistakes through two main stories. The first act tells the troubling tale of Bob Nelson, a TV repairman who became president of the Cryonics Society of California in the 1960s despite having no scientific training. What began as an optimistic mission to freeze people at death for future revival descended into a disaster of failed equipment, secret decisions, and bodies stored in inadequate conditions. The second act features variations on William Carlos Williams' famous poem 'This Is Just to Say,' exploring the art of apologizing without actually being sorry.
Politicians and Apologies
The episode opens with a discussion about how politicians rarely give sincere apologies, often offering the insincere 'I regret the error' type of statement. The hosts discuss teaching children to apologize even when they don't mean it, as a way of acknowledging moral codes. This frames the entire episode's exploration of mistakes, responsibility, and the performance of remorse. The opening notes that this episode was recorded in 2008, when politicians still felt obligated to apologize—unlike today's political climate where such apologies have become even rarer.
- Politicians typically give insincere apologies like 'I regret the error, I meant no harm'
- A parent describes his daughters giving fake apologies with 'cold, steely' looks
- Making children go through the motions of apologizing teaches them to acknowledge moral codes even without genuine remorse
- This episode was recorded in 2008 when politicians still felt obliged to apologize, unlike the current era
" I still have more to learn and to do better to balance diverse interests and listen to people from all walks of life just imagine for a second your partner or your spouse saying something like that to you like with that tone like you would not feel reassured that they were really sorry "
" At least they recognize the moral code. Even if your heart's not in this, I want to watch you go through the motions. This is what people do when they really are sorry. "
The Biblical Story of David and Bathsheba
The episode includes a discussion of the biblical story of King David, who committed adultery with Bathsheba and had her husband killed to cover it up. The prophet Nathan tells David a parable about a rich man stealing a poor man's beloved lamb, enraging David who demands justice. Nathan then reveals 'you are the man,' leading to genuine repentance. This story serves as a template for how getting someone to see their actions from another perspective might lead to real acknowledgment of wrongdoing.
- King David committed adultery with Bathsheba and had her husband killed to cover it up
- The prophet Nathan told David a story about a rich man stealing a poor man's pet lamb
- David demanded justice for the victim before Nathan revealed 'you are the man'
- This led to genuine repentance and David became a better king afterward
" And the prophet looks at him and says, you are the man. And that does it. then David really gets it and he comes apart, you know, and he has a very genuine apology and repentance. "
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